Dear Sister

an open letter

(This is an open letter to a sister church in our family of churches in the U.S. Vineyard. I am posting this publicly for the sake of accountability and to make a clear statement of solidarity. In these days, when denominations and church networks, movements and affiliations seem to be ignoring, covering up and minimizing the impact of abuse, it seems important to stand in solidarity with a sister church that doesn’t.)

Dear Sister,

I’ve only yesterday read the open letter that you posted back in early December for the Gatlin’s.

Somehow, I missed your letter when it was sent around to senior pastors by our VUSA denomination. For that, I am truly sorry. If I try to put myself in your shoes, I can only imagine that hearing from other senior pastors from your church family would be an encouragement, having taken such a difficult, reasoned position seeking to hold accountable shepherds that you all have trusted to lead, feed and protect the flock of God there at the Duluth Vineyard. I’m sorry it took me so long to show up and let you know we’re with you.

Church discipline is always hard but, I think, especially difficult in our modern church culture. It’s hard for us to be communities that try to exercise accountability, discipline, restoration or excommunication when sister churches don’t join us in solidarity.

There are always church disputes and church splits and firings and people who walk away from harmful church situations and power struggles and even major misunderstandings. What brings the kind of clarity that calls for solidarity in your situation is the involvement of GRACE and the criminal investigation around the Gatlin’s and their actions or failure to act. I applaud your courageous work that has, from your public posts and public statements, been heartbreaking for all of you. I have never heard a vindictive word or seen a bitter attitude come from you, only a desire for victims to be heard, cared for and healed and for those who have done harm to be held accountable.

It seems to me that you have sought to act like followers of Jesus throughout this trouble. It seems to me that you have tried to be transparent and caring and willingly engaging in the hard work of doing the right thing. Thank you for an example worth imitating.

It is rare in today’s churchworld climate.

I am writing this to tell you that from a distance I have been proud of you in the way you have handled this situation, for the sake of the victims as well as for the sake of the church. I am writing because it seems to me that you have demonstrated healthy boundaries, healthy expectations and accountability for the leaders who have done harm that is just and right but, sadly, uncommon. And I can only imagine that you have heard criticism from some followers of Jesus, and perhaps even church leaders, and maybe even members of your own church, for the stand you have taken.

I hope you have managed to not take those criticisms to heart.

I’ve read the GRACE report and I am with you.

I am writing this because in your letter you wrote:

We have instructed all members of the Duluth Vineyard and requested that followers of Jesus throughout the Vineyard movement to cease table fellowship with you and you are not to share holy communion with members of the Duluth Vineyard or others in the Vineyard movement.

And you wrote…

You are not to attend any service or event within the Vineyard movement (including any service or event at or affiliated with a Vineyard church) at which holy communion could be celebrated, including worship services and small groups.

I want you to hear from me, as a senior pastor of a Vineyard church, that we stand in solidarity with you and the process of accountability and restoration the Holy Spirit has led you to as a church family, part of our family of Vineyard churches. I want you to hear from me that we will not enable the Gatlin family, should they come here, to circumvent or avoid the healing process that the Holy Spirit has led you all to practice. We stand with you.

The harshest words of Jesus were for the religious leaders of his day that were doing harm to the people of God. The minor prophets called them out. Paul warned the Ephesian leaders against the wolves who would arise from among them to prey on the flock of God. Isaiah and Ezekiel had hard words for those appointed as watchman. It is good and right and godly to walk in that tradition and have high expectations and accountability with senior and national leaders.

Your situation has not been about a difference of opinion or a struggle over who is in charge or a matter of competing visions for the church. You have done due diligence, listened to painful stories, owned your own part, acknowledged a history of bullying behavior from the Gatlin’s and published the 96 page report from GRACE.

Thank you.

The reporting from the Julie Roys website says:

Though Michael and Brenda Gatlin maintained they didn’t know about their son’s alleged abuse, the GRACE report found differently.

On February 20, Michael Gatlin wrote to the church council: “Let me state unequivocally, to the best of our recollection, neither Brenda nor I were ever informed of any allegations of sexual misconduct concerning our son, Jackson Gatlin, from anyone at anytime.”

However, according to the GRACE report, one former graduate of the HLI program emailed Michael and Brenda Gatlin in 2019 with an attached 56-page complaint letter.

It described “behavior constituting sexual harassment under Duluth Vineyard’s policies, harsh and unkind treatment, and spiritual abuse,” according to a church summary. 

Michael and Brenda Gatlin allegedly took no investigative or disciplinary actions based on that letter and did not share it with the Duluth Vineyard church council.

…

In an earlier statement, the church noted that the statute of limitations “prevents criminal charges from being brought against Michael and Brenda Gatlin for failure to report suspected child abuse.” 

I can imagine that it must be very disorienting for a church family to have all this happen and all this information come to the surface about people who have pastored the church and been friends, mentors and leaders for many. We know from our own story that two things can be true at the same time – a person can do good to some people while doing harm to others at the same time. Our responsibility as family is to acknowledge both and hold leaders accountable – and require amends as you all have – where harm has been done.

Two things that jumped out at me from the Roys Report article were…

1)     This wasn’t a one-time transgression but patterns of behavior over time that were hurtful, harmful and not like Jesus.

2)     Except for the statute of limitations, criminal charges could have been laid against the Gatlin’s.

These are both so significant, and such clear breaches of trust it’s impossible for me to imagine why any church would not stand beside you in the practices and expectations you’ve outlined in solidarity with victims. But I’ve been around the church for almost 40 years now and I know our “old boy’s club” practices and misguided enabling we confuse with grace, run strong in the churchworld.

Please know that we love you, we support your efforts and practices towards accountability and restoration. We appreciate your present and ongoing concern for the victims. We admire your honesty, transparency and desire to go public with information. May you find all of us standing in solidarity with you now and in the hard days still to come. If there are practical ways that we can be of help to all or any of you, please let us know what we can do. We are with you. We stand in solidarity with you and we will respect the Spirit led process God has given you.

May God grant you hope in this season and vision for the better days that are ahead.

Brian Metzger,

Senior Pastor, Raleigh Vineyard, a sister church.